Yes, it’s been awhile between posts. The past month has been
funky, sad. Wasn’t even sure if I would be back to the blog, or anything else I
love doing for that matter. Let me explain…a month ago my Momma passed away.
She had cancer. The week before she passed I was able to make the trip back
home to see her in the hospital. There have been so many different emotions
being processed in my world since then and it all hit home when I had closure by going back to help Daddy
clean out some things and bring home some family heirloom pieces. It was
surreal to be in my childhood home without her. The same week our youngest
daughter finished up high school…and that’s when it hit the hardest that Momma
is really gone. She was the first one I wanted to call. That was week before
last.
All last week I thought about this post I’m doing today,
oscillating between writing it/not writing it. Honestly I had lost interest in
doing most everything I truly love doing. Normalcy just didn’t appeal to me.
Realizing it is okay to grieve but not okay to get stuck in the grieving
process has me working my way back to myself, my life. Now I’m looking forward
toward the new normal I will find my life to be, though, I’m still not all that
sure what that will look like. Two big life events plus being the keeper of
heirlooms now has altered my priorities. Maybe I should shut down “Twice Loved
Treasures” all together. Maybe I should make some changes with it and go in a
newer direction, closer to what I’m most passionate about. One thing I am
certain about is that this life I’ve still got left to live is the most
significant DIY project ever!
Part of this DIY project is the decision to live with family
heirlooms that reveal part of who I am. Not to hide them away in a box, as this
Christening gown has been.
In ninety-five years it has only seen the light of
day as thirteen different family members were baptized in infancy. My great,
great grandmother made it for her daughter (my great grandmother). Other
wearers include my grandmother, mother, and me. As the current guardian, I am
choosing to display it in our home relishing in the connection I feel to past
generations whom I have not yet met. I wonder what Grandma Merckling would say
if she knew the “sewing gene” was alive and well within me…ninety-five years
and four generations later. Be encouraged, Dear One, to do the same…if you
have an heirloom piece figure out the best way for you to live with it. If it
is just stuck in a box in a closet it has been reduced to being merely clutter.
Live with the connection to your past, should you have a good, positive one!
As I am moving toward the other side of grief I have been so blessed
with a friend who has just listened to me. On the flip side, one of the least
helpful friends is one who has simply sent me Scriptures on healing. PLEASE,
PLEASE HEAR MY HEART ON THIS MATTER: Jesus IS more essential than the air I breathe
and He IS the One who brings true healing. Without Him I’d be a hopeless basket
case. But what I and anyone else out there in the process of grieving needs is
a Godly friend who listens and then goes to God in prayer for our broken heart
to be healed. Just giving Scripture on God healing the brokenhearted doesn’t
get very far when the person grieving in in the anger stage. The friend who listens
and prays the Scripture(s) FOR the grieving person brings us much farther along
this path than they know. So…Dear Reader…the
point I’m making is this: when your time comes to help a friend through the
process of grief, please, please, please understand that what they need is
someone to listen and pray those Scriptures FOR them until the day comes that
they are able to then claim those Scriptures for themselves. Remember the story
in the OT when Moses needed help in holding his arms up? (Ex 17:8-13) Aaron and
Hur didn’t tell him all about God being the source of strength, instead, they
held up Moses’ arms for him. Be that source of God’s strength for your friend
in need. With your help they WILL get to the side of healing through the power
and love of Jesus!
Whew! I should have forewarned y’all that this would be
lengthy. Thank you so very much for reading along. In the end, as I struggled
with being so real and open, my hope is that somehow, somewhere there is another
who finds encouragement during a funky season of life. It can be so difficult
when we find ourselves here for the first time. Momma is the first person I’m
losing who I’ve been close enough to to miss so dearly. It has been an
unchartered course for me, however, I know that one day grief will be
completely in my rear-view mirror as I live out my different kind of DIY
project…the rest of my life! I pray you, Precious Reader, chooses to do the
same, making your life your most important DIY project ever!
Much love and blessings ~Betsy
Amen! I couldn't have said it better myself. Praying for you girl.
ReplyDeleteThank you, girlfriend!
ReplyDelete